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Tag Archive: Body

Personal Blackmail: How I motivated myself to hit the gym

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personalblackmail before

 12 weeks ago I wrote a blog about how I was  going to use personal blackmail to ensure that I  would get to the gym or workout at least four  times a week for 12 weeks to get myself into the  habits of exercising again. The blackmail  involved a $3000 bet that I was hoping not to  lose.

Thursday 14th November sparked the end of this  $3000 challenge – and guess what? I won!

I mean it isn’t a huge surprise but after the 12 weeks I am  feeling really proud of myself and my achievements and  dedication. It was week 2 of the blackmail when I  decided to sign up to a 12 week challenge at Anytime  Fitness Fairy Meadow and that has made the world of  difference to the outcome of this challenge. While I am  not normally a fan of group workouts I have come to  really enjoy the group sessions as well as the one on one  sessions with my personal trainer Ben.

Although I normally use my words to motivate, today I  am going to use my results to motivate.

At week one I could barely run 1km in 7 minutes 30  seconds. By week 6 I could run it around 6 minutes.  Now I can run easily and hit speeds of 13 on the  treadmill which is excellent for my HIIT training.

Since week one I have gone from 103cm around my belly to 92cm and losing. This part is really important to me. Increased belly circumference can lead to heart disease and diabetes. Exercising has significantly reduced my risks of an unhealthy life.

It just means you need an extra big slice of motivation with an icy cold glass of never ever ever give up.

personalblackmail after

In week 1 I couldn’t do a single man push-up (on my toes and I don’t care how sexist that is I will continue to call them man push-ups…possibly because I believe that all men should be able to do them). Now at week 12 I can do up to 10 man push-ups in a row.

Other changes include stamina in exercising, better breathing while exercising, strength, toned arm and leg muscles and loss of fat around my chest and back and dresses and skirts fitting looser!

While I still have a long way to go to reach my goals I am so proud of what my efforts have achieved. Getting to the gym to work out only 4 days a week has made me feel more confident and happier. While I have barely lost any kilos (pounds) I have gained muscle and understand the balance of this.

Personal blackmail has proven to be a very useful motivation technique to get me off the couch and into the lifestyle I desperately wanted. I am now fitter than ever and ready to dive fist first into my next round of fitness and nutrition goals.

All you need to personally blackmail yourself is a goal, a timeframe, a scary sum of money and the threat of that money going to the worst place you can think of. After that it is up to your diligence and perseverance to make things happen. If you really want something you won’t give up even if you keep failing and falling. You will get up, brush it off and try to succeed again. In fact it can sometimes take many tries and fails before you succeed in something. Personal Blackmail gives you just that little bit of extra accountability.

I have spent the last two years trying to get into the habit of exercising regularly and changing my body and habits back into a healthy lifestyle and only now do I feel like I am on the right track. Will I continue to work out at least 4 times per week? Yes. Will I need to personally blackmail myself to make this happen now? No.

What health and fitness goals have you tried to set for yourself and struggled to meet? Sometimes a failure doesn’t mean it is the wrong goal for you. Sometimes it just means you need an extra big slice of motivation with an icy cold glass of never ever ever give up.

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Does size matter

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As many of you probably realise by now I am not a fashion blogger, however, this does not mean I love clothes any less. I was very intrigued when I stumbled across THIS article regarding uniform sizing in Australia and the fact it was a too hard basket and supposedly pointless exercise.

What intrigued me most was not that Australia and it’s fashion industry refuse to make this happen or that sadly yet unsurprisingly Australian’s don’t see fashion as being a “high growth economic industry”  but it was the fact that there a women who buy clothing that doesn’t fit based on the number on the label.

Are you serious ladies?

Having packed on a bit of weight since my late teenager years I quickly learned the best way to fake still been skinny was to stop wearing clothing that was too tight and to only focus on building a wardrobe of items that FIT. By fit it meant that it didn’t matter if the dress said 14 (to fit over my large bosoms) or a pair of jeans that say size 10 but totally would  have been too big five years ago.

For someone who desperately wants to lose weight to get back to a healthy weight range I can completely understand the pain that vanity causes us to feel when we have to go for the larger size on the rack. But if that larger size means that we won’t have a muffin top then shouldn’t that be enough?

Body confidence is a major issue with women of all sizes but it does shock me to realise that women are buying smaller sizes for the tag not for their body.

Having started a 6 week sewing class last week – more on that to come – I have realised the benefits of clothes matching your actual size measurements not the size you wish you were. Custom made clothing is surprisingly easier to master than people think, provided you have a sewing machine and money for material and patterns but once you have mastered it, it can only mean good things – especially for the vain among us.

Making your own clothes will mean that you decide what label goes onto your clothing. Or better still just cut out the tag when you get home from the store – that works too!

In all honesty I think that people are still thinking of themselves and their weight in complete black and white. Everything seems to focus on skinny versus fat rather than focusing on healthy versus unhealthy. So ladies let’s change the focus en masse and let it be about our hearts and our health not a size.

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Ask yourself why

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New Image

They say when you set a goal it is important to know the emotional connections behind the goal – the motivations behind the WHY. It is all very well to go for something and aim high but if there is no purposeful reason as to why you are doing it then you will soon find there is no reason to keep aiming to reach said goal.

Once I started writing down the reasons behind my current fat loss journey I realised there were so many valid reasons behind it and each and every single point as valid and real as the next one – providing fuel as to why I am eating clean and training mean every chance I can.

While my changes have not been drastic they have been significant enough for me to have made good progress in a month.

These reasons why are very personal and honest and raw – but like I said I am sharing this journey with you and trying to be as real as possible along the way.

Please comment below and tell me why you are committing to your goals? Are you on a fat loss journey as well? I would love to hear about it!

Why I want to be fit

♥ Because all my self esteem issues come back to my issues with my body…I want that reversed. The only issue I want with my body is…well that is just it! I don’t want any issues with my body anymore.
♥ Because I want to halve my body fat.
♥ Because I know confidence is linked to body image.
♥ Because I remember that it felt better throwing on a skimpy tight dress then it does now selecting based on which loose top hides my rolls the best.
♥ Because for once in my life I want to be able to happily wear a bikini on a packed public beach.
♥ Because I want to be that girl who works out in the gym in a crop top because she can.
♥ Because I want to feel what it feels like to be elite at something.
♥ Because I don’t want to get to the same time next year with no changes to my body.
♥ Because my boss and I made a bet to see who could lose 15kgs first and I want to win or at least put up a damn good fight.
♥ Because I don’t want to feel the heaviness of disappoint when I look in the mirror ever again.
♥ Because I am too short to be as fat as I am now.
♥ Because I want to compete in a body building competition before I am 30.
♥ Because I want to prove to people it is possible.
♥ Because I can envision what it would look, feel, taste like.
♥ Because I want to be the hot girl in the office.
♥ Because I want all my ex-boyfriend’s to feel like they really missed out.
♥ Because I don’t want to hate my body anymore.
♥ Because I want to be proud of my 
♥ Because deep down I am pretty vain and I want that vanity to have some solid ground to stand on.

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Here goes -nothing- I mean 20kgs

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Over the past first month of twenty thirteen I have refined and refined my new year’s resolution to be as simple as “Be a woman of my word”. That is not to say I am a liar or a cheater – I am way too honest to get away with that on any level – but I say things that I am going to do and never do them.

Like this time last year and all throughout the entire year that was twenty twelve I talked and talked and talked about losing all my weight. It was very on again off again which seems to be my style, but I was never consistent enough with any of it to actually make a difference in my weight loss goals. It’s kind of depressing really: to realise that you have got almost a whole other year older and you are still talking about doing the same thing. Worst part is that I have let myself put on another 5kgs or more in the past 6 months all because I couldn’t commit to my goal – I wasn’t a woman of my word.

So now, after extensive browsing on the transformations on and reading through Amanda Marie’s incredible journey on I have decided to take the plunge for real this time. I won’t just be talking about this, I will be doing this. No seriously *pulls serious face* I am going to smash this goal out of the ball park!

You know how I know I am serious this time? I started drinking green tea and did it consistently for two weeks before I had to stop (it gave me heaps of little pimples and that made me super sad – I am 25 and do not want the face of a 14year old!) AND I have been eating every three hours, AND I am turned of chocolate (yet another story I am sure I will share), AND I am so on the clean eating bandwagon that I have bought Quinoa and Chia and Greek Yogurt and even made my own protein oats slice – with no sugar! Oh and my boss and I are now in competition to see who can lose 15kgs first so I can’t let him beat me!

Sadly I became that girl…that girl who didn’t realise she got that fat, that still thought of herself in terms of her skinny body, that girl who avoids bikinis and the beach because she doesn’t want to be fatter than everyone there, that girl who could devour a packet of any chocolate biscuits in one sitting and have no self-control to stop it and always feel sick and bloated afterwards, that girl who tries to hide the fat under clothing layers to pretend it doesn’t exist and can’t understand why that dress suddenly doesn’t fit her a few months later, that girl who hates shopping because she can’t wear the styles she is used to. I don’t want to be that delusional skinny fat girl anymore. That girl isn’t me…I am the skinny girl in the middle screaming to fight her way out and be the best possible version of herself she can be!

I realised all the people I admire around me are the ones who eat clean and exercise. To me that speaks volumes about a person’s self-esteem. The only thing letting me down in my life at the moment is my self-esteem which stems from my excess fat and so now – that fat will be banished!

So why am I telling you about it? Well I want to hold myself accountable…so I am going to be blogging about my journey along the way. Also I am always super inspired when reading about other people’s body transformation stories that maybe just maybe WHEN (notice how I didn’t say if??? Eh? Eh?) I reach my goals people will read over my story and be inspired to transform themselves.

Excuse the poor photo qualities but this is me at 18 and me now at 25!

Excuse the poor photo qualities but this is me at 18 and me now at 25!

So for a while I have been vaguely saying that I want my 18yo body back and here I have it pictured side by side with my 25yo body. Seeing them both together I have realised I don’t want either and here is why. On the left we have me at 18 – I was a size 8-10, approximately 50-53kgs looked super slim but always thought I was fat (damn you high school girl mentality). While I do look super slim with a C cup bra I have no tone or definition and ate junk food a lot! Then on the right is me a few months back at 25 – I am a size 12-14, 75kgs, have an E cup bra, have rolls that I have trouble hiding and again I am not happy with my body and think it is fat  – only this time I am closer to the truth. With approximately 36% body fat I am considered obese by medical terms which considering I am so much smaller than a lot of people I know – that is SCARY!!!

If I don’t want to go back to my 18yo body anymore I had to devise a new goal body to aim for. The truth is I want to be a size 8-10 with tone and definition, a body that is fuelled by clean eating not by processed foods. I hope to be back down to a C or D cup bra and weigh about 55kgs – only this time that extra five kilos will be muscle! I want to be able to wear bikinis on the beach with confidence and be one of those girls that work out at the gym in a crop top and short shorts – because she can! I want to be 15-20% body fat and never be fat again!

How am I going to do this? I have one of those body types that responds well to exercise so training 5-6 days a week EVERY week is going to be key to my fat loss goals. My diet is going to be so clean it will be squeaking! Well not quite. I am going to be clean eating as a lifestyle choice and if I want to eat something “naughty” then I can and I will but I will make sure I burn it off at my next workout. If I actually do these two things CONSISTENTLY I will very easily meet my goals in a year, year and a half max. 20kgs in 52 weeks equates to 385gram losses every week – very doable!

So far this year I have put on 700g of muscle (I know it was muscle as it was after a week of weight training!) and lost 8.1cms over my body. I will therefore weigh in weekly but also do my measurements weekly to ensure that my motivation levels stay high by celebrating the little successes!

My goal outfit is a body hugging leopard print dress that I wore out once about 5 years ago and it didn’t fit me since…It is hanging in my wardrobe ready!

I would say wish me luck on my weight loss journey but right now I am feeling so cocky about been a woman of my word that I trust that I can do this. I am a powerful woman and I know God has my back so this goal is going to happen. I look forward to sharing my journey with you.

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Fitness Friday: Get your circuit on

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By Joel Pyper

People can sometimes be mistaken that in order to achieve their goals, they have to stay in the gym for periods of time –  longer than an hour, stretching it out to excesses of two and a half hours! In most cases this is an unnecessarily amount of time. Workouts don’t need to be this long and this is where circuit training comes in.

Circuit training is short bursts of resistance exercise using moderate weights and frequent repetitions, followed quickly by another burst of exercise targeting a different muscle group and in a more advanced technique, another one or two exercises. Two different muscle groups are targeted in a way that prevents muscular fatigue which allows there to be little to no rest between the exercises. This raises the heart rate and adds a cardiovascular aspect to resistance training.

In a study conducted in 1982 it was found that circuit training produced a greater cardiovascular fitness and strength gain compared to regular resistance training which consists of rest between each set of an exercise.

Below is basic circuit that can be performed in any gym! I have combined three exercises here though you can start by doing two back to back instead.

1a. Squats – 15

1b. Shoulder press – 15

1c. 45 seconds on the rowing machine


2a. 45 seconds cycling

2b. Push ups – 10

2c. Bicep curls – 15


3a. Lat pulldown – 15

3b. Walking lunges – 16 steps

3c. Bench tricep dips – 15


This simple circuit should take around half an hour or a bit longer with rests between each group of exercises. The protocol is to do each group of exercises three times. So you would repeat the 1’s three times before moving on to the 2’s.

Have fun getting your circuit on!

About Joel Pyper
Qualifications: BSc. Exercise Science (UOW) Cert III & IV Fitness Level I Boxing

Snowboarder, surfer and recently graduated university student. Interested and pursuing sports physiotherapy and combining it with travel. 22 year old who finds it hard to sit still – active and enthusiastic about life and all the opportunities it offers.

I have been personal training for a year and have had professional experience with the St. George Illawarra Dragons (NRL) and Savvy Fitness, but now work with Anytime Fitness, Kiama.

Anytime Fitness, Kiama
Anytime Fitness, Kiama represents as much well-being as it does fitness. It is a place for dedicated athletes, the elderly, the beginners and the rest of the active community. Not being a specialised gym, the establishment has all the necessary tools to improve any person’s quality of life and level of fitness with improvements and new exercise equipment being added to make gym time as enjoyable as possible.

Free weights, machines, digital classes on demand and friendly staff ensure that your time in the gym is as beneficial as possible. Being a 24-hour gym, you can exercise anytime of the day or night using your own security-access key! That’s 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Talk about no more excuses! 3/3 Brown St Kiama, NSW 2533

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Fitness Friday: simple starts

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dont give up

Just this morning before I started writing this article, I was walking down to see how the surf was looking (not too good unfortunately), when I bumped in to my friend who said she needed advice on where to start. Well, technically her words were “I haven’t been to the gym lately but I don’t, I just need, could you, like, kind of like something, I don’t know, uhh – I just need help!”

I believe a lot of people are in the same boat here as they have found portions of the day where exercise could be a possibility, yet don’t know how to make the most of their time. In this brief instalment, I will list some generic and easy to follow exercise ideas that can be done no matter what time frame you have.

Firstly is the most widespread go-to protocol – walking and running.

Walking is the easiest line of physical work in the world. It can be done almost anywhere which makes it so appealing to the general public. Here are some tips to make sure you are putting adequate effort in to your walks or runs.

For walking:

  • A regular paced walk that you normally do is not enough, as you tend to walk at this pace most of the week, your body has become accustomed to the effort it needs to put in to ensure your body works efficiently to remain internally stable and balanced (maintain homeostasis). When you set out on a walk for exercise, you need to up the intensity to make your body work harder. In many cases, simply put, the harder you work, the more fuel burning your body needs to perform work (like a car). So get walking at a pace where you feel like you can talk in bursts but can’t hold a conversation. This type of breathlessness is an indication that you are working harder than you would normally during walking.

For running:

  • A way to boost your metabolism and force your body to work harder is to introduce short bursts of sprints in to your run. These can be done completely at your discretion regarding how far, how often and how hard. Short bursts of effort rely on different fuel sources in comparison to continuous running so burn it all with shorts sprints.

Exercise at the gym – Where to start?

Here’s a little gym formula you can follow depending upon how many days you are spending at the gym:

  •  1 day: resistance followed by cardio. Machine weights, free weights and body weight exercises that incorporate more than one joint (compound exercises) such as squats, leg press, push ups, machine rows followed by cardio equal to half of the time spent doing weights.
  •  2 days: one resistance day and one resistance/cardio day.
  • 3 days: 2 resistance days and one cardio day.
  • 4 days: 2 resistance days, one cardio day and one light resistance/cardio day.
  • 5 days: 2 resistance days, 2 cardio days and one light resistance/cardio days.
  • 6 days: 2 – 3 resistance days, 2 – 3 cardio days, 1 – 2 light cardio days.
  • 7 days: 3 resistance days, 2 cardio days, 2 light cardio days.

When doing the resistance days, make sure there is at least 1 or 2 days of no resistance training performed in the beginning. For example do this training on Monday and Thursday. A simple protocol can consist of doing 3 sets of 10 – 15 of each exercise.

Exercise at home – What to do?

The most simple and effective workouts can be done right at home! You have a body and a floor (hopefully!). Here’s a small list of links that I find to be very effective at addressing home based exercise:

This should be enough to give you a start in the right direction! I forgot to say in the last article that if you have anything specific you need help with or are unsure about –leave your comments below with Miss Kitty and I’ll try to address every matter within articles to come!

About Joel Pyper
Qualifications: BSc. Exercise Science (UOW) Cert III & IV Fitness Level I Boxing

Snowboarder, surfer and recently graduated university student. Interested and pursuing sports physiotherapy and combining it with travel. 22 year old who finds it hard to sit still – active and enthusiastic about life and all the opportunities it offers.

I have been personal training for a year and have had professional experience with the St. George Illawarra Dragons (NRL) and Savvy Fitness, but now work with Anytime Fitness, Kiama.

Anytime Fitness, Kiama
Anytime Fitness, Kiama represents as much well-being as it does fitness. It is a place for dedicated athletes, the elderly, the beginners and the rest of the active community. Not being a specialised gym, the establishment has all the necessary tools to improve any person’s quality of life and level of fitness with improvements and new exercise equipment being added to make gym time as enjoyable as possible.

Free weights, machines, digital classes on demand and friendly staff ensure that your time in the gym is as beneficial as possible. Being a 24-hour gym, you can exercise anytime of the day or night using your own security-access key! That’s 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Talk about no more excuses! 3/3 Brown St Kiama, NSW 2533

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The basic corporate wardrobe for women

Corporate Miss Kitty - Blazer and Dress Suit from Target
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If I only I looked as put together as a Victoria’s Secret model when I go to work

Dear Kitty

 Please help me! I was successful in getting a job in a corporate office but it will be the first time working in corporate environment and have no idea what I am going to need for my wardrobe! I don’t think one black pencil skirt and a button up shirt is going to cut it. I don’t really have much money to buy a lot right away either.

 Can you help?

From Clueless Corporate

 Okay so that help message is actually a fake…however, I imagine it written by me two years ago if I had of had anyone to ask! Working in magazines for 4 years meant I could pretty much wear anything to work as long as if I was going to interview anyone face to face I looked somewhat professional or at the very least fashionable. While this option of choose your own work wear can help you figure out your own style and experiment, quite often results in you giving in to the lazy version of yourself and opting for jeans and a nice top most days.

Entering corporate world can be a little scary if you don’t have anything corporate in your wardrobe and without the fist full of cash and knowledge to go on a raging shopping spree.

I managed to scrounge up an outfit to wear to the interview but wasn’t due to start till four weeks later. This gave me time to do the google research on “what to wear in a corporate office” but somehow I always seemed to come up dry.

 With this in mind I have created a comprehensive list of what basic items you will need to get by in a corporate office environment and actually look the part. This list contains the bare minimum you will need when working the 9-5 five days a week at least in the beginning few months till you have the money to splurge a little and build up the wardrobe over a period of time. It is everything I wish I knew before I started.

Good luck in your new positions and I hope this information helps!

Black Blazer from Tokito – $70 on sale yes please!

  • Clothes: Have each of the following: 1 x Suit Dress; 1 x Tailored plain black pant; 1 x black pencil skirt; 1 x black suit jacket, and 5 x button up blouses/ dressy tops. The combination of these items will allow you to mix and match different outfit’s enough so that you don’t feel like you are wearing the same outfit every day. The suit jacket and pants/skirt don’t need to be the matching set but they need to be all plain black if they are not. Surprisingly the best black suit jacket and skirt that I have is from Supre! When you first start out sticking to blacks, charcoals and greys is a good idea but once you are settled you can experiment with colour a lot more without looking risqué.
  • Fashion accessories: A corporate environment is not the place to test out all the latest feathery headbands and chunky bracelets but what you can experiment with is chunky necklaces, simple flat bow headbands, and thin waist belts in various colours. I would however keep your jewellery minimal and only wear your demure rings, bracelets and earrings. Think Blair Waldorf in Gossip Girl before you go overboard. You can totally get away with a cocktail ring every other day but steer clear of giant hoop earrings or dangly disco balls!
  • Hosiery: Say goodbye to bare legs and welcome pantyhose as your new best friend.  Go for thick black in winter and thin tanned in summer and a little FYI is the lower the Denier number on the packet the thinner the stockings and the more chance they have of getting a ladder. Must adhere to rule is the second a pair of stockings gets a run tie them up (so you can tell them apart from the rest) and throw them out! For variety you can get patterned options from a range of stores so have fun with spots and checks – no slutty fishnets though! Playing the sexy secretary isn’t the best idea when you want to get taken seriously.
  • Shoes:There isn’t much room for fancy and unfortunately the go-to ballet flats are a little too “casual” for corporate world and are better left for under your desk relief or walking to and from the train station/parking spot. You will want at least 1-2 pairs of black closed toe pumps. Something that is easy to walk in but looks the part. Often shoes with platforms are the comfiest despite their height as they often have a softer angle for your ankle. This is where you shouldn’t skimp on quality for a cheaper price tag – please note however one of my best pairs of work shoes cost $20 on sale from Rubi.

    Metal Plate Tote from Colette


  • Bag:My advice is to have one larger bag and a smaller clutch with you every day. The larger bag will be a blessing on the way to and from the office housing the smaller clutch, sunnies in a protective case, book, water bottle, lunch for the day, basic makeup bag and possibly an additional cardigan or scarf for colder months. The smaller clutch will be able to hold your wallet essentials – cards/cash/id – as well as lipgloss/lipstick, purse sized spray of perfume and your phone. You need to trust me on the larger bag/smaller bag thing as when you are sent for the coffee or supplies run or are out and about visiting a client you do not want to be stuck hauling around a hefty bag full of your life story. However, when you are on the train you will be thankful for the larger bag and all that it carries for you. It will also stop you from carrying around a crappy cloth tote. You’re welcome.

    Panelled Foldover Turnlock Clutch from Colette


  • Hair and Makeup:Always have immaculate makeup and hair done neatly. Look like you made an effort to look effortless as just rolled out of bed hair and doing your makeup in the mirror at work is not going to fly. In corporate world dishevelled is the dirty word. 

    Corporate Miss Kitty – Blazer and Dress Suit from Target


The places to shop on a budget in Australian retail outlets are in no particular order: (sorry everyone else…I am sure you can figure out the equivalent in your country)

 Target – city stores have the best hauls – I got a matching suit dress and skirt for under $110

Myer – but only during sale seasons otherwise it is more costly check out brands such as Tokito for great work shirts, save the Tokito suits for when you have a little more moolah

Colette – for bags and accessories, especially their bags – swoon

Supre – for basic items but like I mentioned above their basic black suit jacket and pencil skirt have been my corporate fashion saviour

Valley Girl & Tempt – owned by the same company but stocking different things in both stores you will definitely manage to find corporate dresses, tailored black pants and work shirts here.

Events – have great tailor made suits for women but full price can be a bit much when you are first starting out with a budget. Sale time however you can score bigtime – I got my first ‘proper’ pinstripe pant suit here when it was on sale and I saved a couple of hundred

My favourite online hotspots for corporate wear include:

Victoria’s Secret
Asos – As Seen on Stars

The best part about these stores and brands is that you don’t have to buy the same size for top and bottom, you can mix and match and there is also a high probability you will find something fantastic at sale prices.

Tell me about your first corporate experience below! What brands or shops do you find the best corporate attire at low prices?

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Fat-Shaming is wrong but are you happy?

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With a recent attack of fat-shaming on a news presenter in America having gone viral, there are many girls defending her very well-worded stance and slamming the idea of fat-shaming someone. I think the focus is all wrong.

To be blunt and straight to the point I think any kind of insert-descriptor-here shaming is wrong. Religion-shaming, slut-shaming, fat-shaming – it is all wrong and unnecessary and is all passing judgement on other people’s lives and that will never have a positive outcome for anyone involved.

Since the American news reporter took her stance against a faceless bully I have read countless blogs and commentary for people defending her, giving her compliments and support and that is wonderful to see.

What is wrong about fat-shaming is that many of these women in particular (men don’t seem to cop it in quite the same way) are 1. Beautiful people regardless; and (perhaps most importantly) 2. Happy. Even if they weren’t these two things it is no-one else’s right to point out to them that they don’t fit societies “normal” sizing mould. This idea is ludicrous.

What is inconsistent about these negative fat-shaming judgements is that a size 12, 75kgs woman who appears to the naked eye as societies generalisation of what constitutes “fat”, actually could have a lower body fat percentage than a seemingly slim and naturally size 8 girl who can eat what she wants and not get bigger.

With a not-so-secret obsession with the fitness industry and bodybuilders in particular I understand the benefits of being fit and healthy. My monthly mood swings are much more intense and depressing if I haven’t been going to the gym on a regular basis. Also while I continue to enjoy the way Ben & Jerry’s tantalises my taste buds, I appreciate the benefits of eating clean and getting in regular cardio sessions.

It is as simple as Elle Woods put it in Legally Blonde:

“Exercise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy and happy people do not shoot their husbands…they just don’t”

We all know that exercise can improve fitness and mood. It doesn’t matter what size you are exercise scientifically will give you endorphins. With the logic that people get bigger due to poor diets and lack of exercise I really want to ask in the most delicate and meaning no offense way possible – are these bigger women happy?

In the Sex and The City movie when Samantha sits around with her girlfriends after putting on five kilos from poor eating choices – Carrie comments that while she would look great at any size – was she happy?

The answer was no.

Everyone has a different situation. It could actually be something outside that persons control like medical conditions such as an under-active thyroid. For those who can help it, make sure you are happy with yourself at that size, or any size for that matter.

In conclusion I want to condemn those who judge others. We don’t know their story or what goes on in their minds so if they are truly happy in their own body no other opinion should matter in the end but that doesn’t mean it needs to be heard. For those who are actually unhappy with the size you are at, then start taking baby steps towards change. Life is too short to be unhealthy and unhappy with yourself either physically or mentally, especially if it is something within your control to change.

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Make goal actions non-negotiable

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Sometimes we have a goal…and we don’t fulfil it. Sometimes we know what we need to do to reach that goal…but we don’t do what we need to. For example I know that if I made the time to exercise for half hour every day or run for 5km a day I would lose the weight I need to guaranteed. But I don’t do it do I? My goal is to lose ten kilos but I don’t do what I know would fix the situation.

If you are anything like me then you know what the problem is – self sabotage! That little inner-voice that likes to get its own way, take the easy route in anything and likes to see you fail. An article I read recently on self-sabotage written by a renowned psychologist said that he couldn’t imagine how hard it would be living with a voice inside your head that sabotaged everything you tried to do to succeed in life. He was right. It is hard to have this voice inside egging you on to make the wrong choices and you do listen to it. Mostly because it is easier to shut it up by giving in to it. This little voice is responsible for you not reaching your goals, it is the reason you feel like you are always chasing your own tail in almost all situations and the reason you cannot make commitments to yourself.

The only way you can make a goal come to fruition is by committing yourself 100% to do everything you need to do to achieve it. How long it takes to reach this goal depends not only on the type of goal but more importantly on your level of commitment. However, the inner voice sabotaging your life can also be responsible for the delay in achieving the most simplest of goals. This inner voice can make your even the most determinedly committed person an uncommitted pile of mess.

This is where the idea of non-negotiables comes into play. I first came across this term when I asked my fellow facebookers what things could I do to get up earlier in the morning when my alarm goes off. One particular friend said I should make it a non-negotiable. If commitment was a lock, non-negotiables would be the key. If you are committed to a goal you will do what it takes to meet that goal. Full-stop. It is that simple. If you are committed to exercising before work every morning and your alarm goes off half an hour earlier than normal then you get up with that first alarm – no negotiations allowed!

Unfortunately if your inner voice kicks in before your feet are in your joggers and you’re out the door, you will undoubtedly find ways to talk yourself out of it. You know what is so simple about a non-negotiable is that this inner debate doesnt count. You should be getting out of bed anyway or getting on with whatever you committed yourself to get on with! Turning actions toward your goals into non-negotiables is a sure fire way of slowly but surely forming a new habit…one that will no doubt serve you well.

Non-negotiables can be hard. But it gets easier. Each time you follow through with a non-negotiable action your brain processes this. As you may or may not know, the more we repeat a pattern the more it enhances that neural pathway in our brain and hey presto! a habit is formed.

Next time you have a goal that is getting away from you look at yourself square in the mirror make the committment to yourself (how could you lie to your face?) that the action you need to take for this goal to become a reality will henceforth become a non-negotiable rendering your inner self-sabotaging voice useless. I mean you can’t negotiate something that is non-negotiable right?

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Thanksgiving Thursday

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Inspired by veteran blogger Gala Darling and her TILT I am continuing the tradition here at MYOW by holding Thanksgiving Thursday. Thursday seems like as good a time as any to pause and reflect on all the wonderful things in my life I have to be thankful for. So without any further adeui here is what I am loving this past week…

  • The wonderful view at my new apartment and how wonderful it looks every morning as the sun rises over the ocean (I swear I will be forever jealous of my 24 year old self if I never get another view like this one)
  • My new apartment.
  • Getting my freedom and independance back.
  • Romantic dinners that my boyfriend cooked for me.
  • My boyfriend and how excited he gets after creating a new song for his band Form One Planet.
  • How excited the candidates at my work get when I score them interviews for their dream roles.
  • Harry Potter <3 (Who else can’t wait for the last movie installment??)
  • Losing weight for the 4th consecutive week in a row. I owe this to Michelle Bridges and her wonderful 12 Week Body Transformation Challenge. I am currently on week 3 of the challenge and more detail on this is coming soon.
  • Physio and acupuncture! I slipped in the shower on the weekend and caused some fine bruising and pain in my lower back. On a colleagues advice I attended physio for the first time which worked wonders and then my physio gave me acupncture for the first time and WOW!
  • Cuddles and hot chocolates on cold winter nights.

So what are you loving in your life right now? I would love to hear about it!!

Love and Leopard Print
Miss Kitty

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